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HomeTag: MTG satire

Tag: MTG satire

MTG News
00
Warning: Parents Discover TMNT Play Boosters in Children’s Halloween Candy

Warning: Parents Discover TMNT Play Boosters in Children’s Halloween Candy

Timothy Zaccagnino 10 days ago MTG News, Satire

Please check your child’s Halloween candy so they don’t end up opening multiple Raphaels.

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MTG News
00
New Star Trek MTG Set Revolutionizes Fabled Chair Tribal Archetype

New Star Trek MTG Set Revolutionizes Fabled Chair Tribal Archetype

Timothy Zaccagnino 16 days ago MTG News, Satire

Thanks to Star Trek, Chair Tribal is back on the menu. You might want to sit down for this one.

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MTG News
00
First Spirit Halloween Opens Up in New Phyrexia’s Bustling Downtown

First Spirit Halloween Opens Up in New Phyrexia’s Bustling Downtown

Timothy Zaccagnino September 7, 2026 MTG News, Satire

New Phyrexia is broadening its commercial horizons with the plane’s very first Spirit Halloween, located in The Dross Pits right next to Yankee Candle.

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Satire
00
MTG’s Purge Day Legalizes All Cards Across All Formats for 12-Hour Period

MTG’s Purge Day Legalizes All Cards Across All Formats for 12-Hour Period

Timothy Zaccagnino August 2, 2026 Satire

What would YOU do if you could get away with playing anything in Magic for 12 days? Or would you be one of the ones who simply hides and waits it out?

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Satire
00
Sir Patrick Stewart Accidentally Signs โ€˜Professor Xโ€™ on Star Trek Magic: The Gathering Cards

Sir Patrick Stewart Accidentally Signs โ€˜Professor Xโ€™ on Star Trek Magic: The Gathering Cards

Timothy Zaccagnino July 25, 2026 Satire

MTG’s releasing actor-signed Magic cards when Star Trek releases, but Sir Patrick Stewart might’ve forgotten who he played during the signing process.

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Satire
00
Magic: The Gathering Announces Homelands Remastered for 2027

Magic: The Gathering Announces Homelands Remastered for 2027

Timothy Zaccagnino June 27, 2026 Satire

You wanted less Universes Beyond and more Magic IP? Well Wizards of the Coast has responded with a return to the critically acclaimed Homelands set.

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Satire
00
Fleem Is Dead. Long Live Fleem.

Fleem Is Dead. Long Live Fleem.

Peter Smith May 30, 2026 Satire

It’s Fleeming Time! Mark Rosewater announced that we might be getting Fleemed soon! That’s Fleem-tastic!

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MTG Cards
00
WotC Falls Short of Required Lightning Greaves Reprints for Financial Quarter

WotC Falls Short of Required Lightning Greaves Reprints for Financial Quarter

Timothy Zaccagnino May 23, 2026 MTG Cards, Satire

Wizards of the Coast fell short on their target for Lightning Greaves reprints, despite putting a new version in literally every possible set they could have put one in.

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Satire
00
MTG Introduces Ultra-Fast “Pick-Fifteen” Draft Format

MTG Introduces Ultra-Fast “Pick-Fifteen” Draft Format

Timothy Zaccagnino May 14, 2026 Satire

The data’s in and Pick-Two Draft has simply been too slow. Time to take it up a notch. Not to 11. To 15!

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MTG News
00
Commander Player Rule 0s Ham Sandwich Into Command Zone, Wins By Landslide

Commander Player Rule 0s Ham Sandwich Into Command Zone, Wins By Landslide

Eli Weinberg March 22, 2026 MTG News

In an absolutely stunning turn of events. someone just won a cEDH tournament with a literal ham sandwich.

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Satire
00
Study Proves Arena Shuffler Is Bugged, and Affects Literally Only You

Study Proves Arena Shuffler Is Bugged, and Affects Literally Only You

Timothy Zaccagnino March 14, 2026 Satire

That’s right “Variance Truthers”, Arena’s been bugged this whole time, and it’s really, really been messing up specifically your games.

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Satire
00
Pedro Pascal Cast as Fblthp in Live-Action Magic: The Gathering Movie

Pedro Pascal Cast as Fblthp in Live-Action Magic: The Gathering Movie

Timothy Zaccagnino February 21, 2026 Satire

Finally, some REAL news about the Magic: The Gathering movie! Well, not really, but who knows what’s going on with that thing, anyway?

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